Sweigart Report: “Chemtrails” and the “FunVax”| Vol. 3 / No. 21.1

CONtrails | Photo: fdecomite, CC BY 2.0

Say it with me, folks: CONDENSATION trails. CON trails. Not CHEMtrails.

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So in my trawling the net for the craziest things I can find, I came across this old conspiracy theory from 2012. It’s at the nexus between “chemtrail” conspiracy theorists and CIA human experimentation conspiracy theorists, and it’s pretty awesome even if snopes pointed out all the problems with it years ago.

Basically, someone on the boards over at “chemtrailcentral.com” posted a link to an old “naturalnews.com” article about “funvax,” a supposed vaccine used to fight religious fundamentalism. The idea is that “chemtrails,” which, remember, are an apparently global conspiracy of dropping clouds of things from planes to do unspecified things to people, in this case are being used to test a vaccine against people being crazy religious fundies.

It centers around a probably fake video probably made in order to kickstart a crowdfunding campaign to make a chemtrail documentary, but we’re still not totally sure where the video really comes from. What we do know is that the science of such a vaccine is almost entirely without merit, so, yeah. Bunk.

From the article:

It’s clear from the document that this mind-altering, brain-infecting vaccine was intended from the start to be deployed against civilian populations. In fact, the document discusses plans for covertly taking biological samples from dead civilians in order to determine the effectiveness of the aerosolized dispersal effort:

… a blood sample of militant casualties or deceased civilian would provide the most accurate estimate of the rate of vaccination… biological samples from living subjects may be covertly taken… the tests that should be repeated using the VSV287 are high atmospheric tests…

An airborne virus would be the preferred route of infection. A strain named VSV287 has been designed to spread via air… Only human trials can determine VSV287’s effect on religiosity and spirituality… high atmospheric dispersal or dispersal by a ground level moving object appears to be the most practical.

Ah, just go to snopes, naturalnews readers.

Happy Monday, everyone.

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Richard Ford Burley is a human, writer, and doctoral candidate at Boston College, as well as an editor at Ledger, the first academic journal devoted to Bitcoin and other cryptocurrencies. In his spare time he writes about science, skepticism, feminism, and futurism here at This Week In Tomorrow.